The Endless "To do" List

M3 Mania has ended. I turned in my final today, proceeded to take the lung and prostate practical (almost mechanically). By now, tests have become a part of norm. We learn how to program our minds to ingest voluminous amounts of information in such short periods of time to answer question after question (and then we repeat the process). It's a well-oiled process for the most part. Except one big problem- retention. In the end, after an exam, you feel numb, knowing well that most of the information you meticulously hand wrote on multiple pieces of paper to committed to short term memory, will dissipate to a foregone memory. The reality of medical school.

When I walked out, I felt relieved but also unsure about what to do with myself. I have become so school-centric; my long to-do lists revolves around getting through material for small group or lecture, planning electives, preparing MSP sessions, etc. I can now attend to the growing list of things, some school-related (odds and ends), as well as a plethora of life things, namely shopping and social engagements.

The end of M3, which included cancer, blood disorders (leukemia, lymphoma and anemias) and epidemiology takes us to Christmas break. I am looking forward to spending time with my family. Outside of the cancer block, I was able to spend time in the pediatric intensive care unit in Oakland, working with a diverse spectrum of critically ill patients. I also had the pleasure and pure enjoyment of teaching cardiac anatomy and ischemic heart disease to first years during MSP sessions.

When we return from break sometime in January (not sure what date exactly) we start our last preclinical block (Life Cycle). A couple of weeks ago, our course directors sat us down and gave us that unwelcome talk about the "B" word, we have tried so hard to suppress. THE BOARDS have come upon us, infiltrating our subconscious and libraries with board review books. Not exactly sure when studying begins, just know it's going to be long, hard and epic. Overall, I'm apathetic to the exam. More concerned with getting it over with to move on to a "watershed moment" in our educational training- the wards. Hopefully, in the process I'll relearn all those important facts that have escaped.

Although we have become programmed professional information memorizes and test takers, I still can not believe how fast time has gone by. It was a year ago, when I finished my cardio exam and was preparing for clinical interlude. Now, I'm moving into uncharted study territory.

For now, I'll bask in being done. And with time, after some distraction (time to go shopping), I might actually look at the oh so endless "to do" list. I am hoping to reflect and write to process second year, looking at how I have changed and how far I have come.

From my year of medical school, I have learned that no matter how many things you have to do, you must always remember that you also have to live your life.