We're only Human

A week has passed since I took my board exams. Although it has only been one week, it feels like I took the exam months ago. As expected, I have already forgotten all those facts that were crammed into every nook and cranny of my brain. I've done everything I can to suppress the memory of the exam, including forgetting all those questions that came out of left field. Oh well- it is what it is.

Older classmates and physicians have told me that completing the exam is an accomplishment in itself. This is true. We always seem to forget that point.

Generations of physicians have taken this exam before clerkships. In a way, the Step 1 represents a rite of passage for medical students transitiontioning from the lecture hall to the wards. But at the same time, taking the exam left me feeling numb and inadequate. After answering my last question (question 336), I realized that no matter how much you study, there will always be things (mostly trivial details) you'll never know on an exam.

We're only human.

As I continue to distance my mind from the post-boards anxiety, I'm enjoying the oblivious bliss that comes with finishing the exam and not knowing that three digit score that has been rumored to play some role in determining the course our future. I spent the last week doing nothing but relaxing, sitting in the sun, running, biking, kickboxing, exercising, and catching up with friends and family. I tucked away all the board review books and flashcards (out of sight and now out of mind) and finally caught up on some of my favorite tv shows, including Ugly Betty.

This unenventful and unproductive week was exactly what I needed to culminate the end of my second year and the monthes of endless studying that go into preparing for the Step 1 boards exams. Now, I feel refreshed and mentally prepared to embark on the next phase of medical school- third year, which reminds me- I need to update my email signatures.

Before being thrown into the wards, we have transitional clerkship (TC)- a two week buffer. TC represents the perfect time to be reminded of how to present patient findings and perform focused physical exams, learn necessary skills (suturing, blood draws, ABG, etc.) and be reminded that we will survive what may feel like one of the scariest moments in our medical school lives.

I'm not sure what to expect from the third year. I start off with medicine at the general hospital. I've heard so many different stories (some uplifting and some not so promising). I'm not sure how I will cope with working 6 days a week and losing sleep on my call nights. I'm not sure how to maintain my life outside medical school, when I'll be spending most of my time in the hospital. I'm really just not sure about anything...

Time and experience will tell how I will adapt to the third year. I'm keeping an open mind to the possibilities.

I am looking forward to being reunited with all my friends and classmates. It will be nice to touch bases and form support groups as we venture into uncharted waters. Hopefully, transitional clerkship will teach us the basic strokes we need so that we coast through our first clerkship rather than drown.